Question:
Tomorrow I am going for my first trip. I heard that lot couples brek up after guy goes OTR?
How bad is relly?

Answer:
has a tendency to bring out any "flaws" in a personal relationship real fast. If you and your significant other really work at it, really talk and listen to one another, really try to understand what the other is doing and going through, you can build a stronger relationship than you ever dreamed possible.
It is sadly funny, but when I was OTR my wife and I talked more often and more things, and with better quality than we do now that I am home every day.
I will always be a mutter trucker at heart.
Answer:
Originally posted by uturn2001:
OTR has a tendency to bring out any "flaws" in a personal relationship real fast. If you and your significant other really work at it, really talk and listen to one another, really try to understand what the other is doing and going through, you can build a stronger relationship than you ever dreamed possible.
Uturn hit the nail right on the head.
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"Got the bird dog on...
Dodgin' the scales...
80 miles an hour and a step outta jail..." From "Rollin' Home, Pirates of the Mississippi)
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"I've always been different with one foot over the line.
Winding up somewhere, one step ahead or behind.
It ain't been so easy, but I guess I shouldn't complain.
I've always been crazy, but it's kept me from going insane." (from Waylon Jennings)
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Member: Happy Dweller Society
Owner Operator Division

Answer:
I don't think the rate is any worse than any other occupation. Since almost 70 percent of marriages end in divorce your ocupation has little to do with it. If it's going to happen it will happen no matter what.
I will say if your spouse is against you going OTR then don't. Even if you think there's a chanch your spouse is against it then don't. Living that life long dream of being a truck driver just isn't worth it. It's barely worth it for most when every thing is ok at home.
'Carpe Diem' does not mean 'fish of the day'.
"If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles."

Answer:
If you have children, your spouse will be doing all of the disciplining and making decisions on the spot, occassionally. It is very important that you support her decisions and back her up on them. If she can't be trusted to make everyday decisions, you NEED to stay home.
There have been many times I just bit my lip and said " Well, you handled it the way you felt it should be handled. If I would have been home, I may have handled it slightly different, but, hey, it works for me"
Good luck

Answer:
Originally posted by ondik:
Tomorrow I am going for my first trip. I heard that lot couples brek up after guy goes OTR?
How bad is relly?
I find that there are many more drivers who are either dicvorced or who are on their 3rd, 4th, 5th wives.
My 1st wife divorced me soon after I started driving-she said it was pointless to stay married to someone who was home only 2-3 days a month, who wasn't around to help raise the kids, keep up the house, cars, etc. She was right.
Now, there ain't enough money in the world to get me to stay gone from my current wife for more than a few days at a time.
I missed the first 7 years of my kid's life because of trucking. I missed out on a lot of the things that most people take for granted, like seeing their kid in school productions, sports, etc. I missed out on it because I thought making a **** poor wage driving a truck was worth it. It wasn't and isn't.
And wages are still plummeting. Nope, it ain't worth it, there are easier ways to make more money and actually have a life outside of your truck.
@#*!%$^@!
Answer:
One important point that was mentioned. It is important to remember that the situation will be viewed from two, {or more if you have kids}, perspectives.
Your wife will one day think to herself, "well he sends checks home, but what else is he good for". You have to keep this in mind and give her the reminders of what it was she once saw in you.
Some simple things, the simpler the better, and not overly expensive either.
ALWAYS remember important dates, when you are on the road. If you can't be there, make sure your presense is known. When talking to her, spend 90% of the time talking about her and her surroundings, and LISTEN.
Small icons of affection, but they must be varied. A postcard, an occational, I LOVE YOU card. IF she grew up somewhere else, a souvenier from her home town as you pass through. The more personal the better. "Just don't get caught stealing the street sign". hehe
If she has a favorite radio station, dedicate a song to her from you. But don't ever ask her if she heard it, keep doing it until she tells you about it!!!
That one may take days, or weeks, but it will really get her heart when she hears it!
Oh, here's a good one, ask her if she has the "Honey-Do" list ready several days before your scheduled home. That'll throw her off balance and she might just feel sorry for you and shorten the list. Then actually do some of them, when you get home!!!!
You get the idea, COMMUNICATE. Not just with the phone!!!! They have books on this stuff. But even if you do see one in the truck stop, I think I would prefer to buy one at Waldens or Barnes & Noble.. hehe
Good Luck, and wishing you the best.
Sorry I had to add this, don't forget the RELATIVES and NEIGHBORS!!! Keep your presense known to them as well. They are the ones she is talking to while you are gone!!! So remember to send them the occational rock you find on the side of the road, {no not that WET one} , and the pretty butterfly's you scrape off your grill.

Answer:
In my case; being on the road during the week made my marriage stronger.
I have been with my wife for 18 years, and like any marriage, we've had our ups and downs---we've had some really bad fights (and done some really good making up ).
Lonliness makes your heart grow fonder; so when it is time to go home---the wife and I are actually happy to see each other.
If I was to go back to a factory job, and be home every night; I have no doubt that we'd start arguing like brother and sister, because of spending too much time together.
This is how my relationship is with my wife...yours, his, or hers may be different.
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Cover Your Cans People!!!It's apparent this place is never going to change....then again; why should it? It gets the clientel it deserves.
Bette Midler

Answer:
What White Dog says. I can attest to that. Sometimes, we can't wait until I go back out on the road!
Oink! Oink! Oink! Grunt! Grunt!
Answer:
...my marriage is the best its been since our kids were born. We dont have time to argue on the weekends. I dont think it would be this way if I were only home 2 or 3 days a month. I guess I am merely a quasi-dweller since I am home every Sat & Sun. Works for me!
Be good and you will be lonesome.~M Twain~